by Paula Brunning
Counsellor / Parenting Coach / Career Coach

This month represents a significant milestone for my youngest daughter—she is starting university. Having grown up in the Middle East and Asia, she is now making her first move to her passport country. This transition is more than a mere change of address; it’s a pivotal moment filled with excitement, uncertainty, and opportunities for growth. For many young adults, especially those raised in global environments, the journey from adolescence to adulthood can be both exhilarating and daunting.

As parents, we often find ourselves reflecting on our roles in preparing our children for such transitions. Did we equip them with the essential skills needed for this next chapter? Have we nurtured their independence while providing a supportive foundation? These are questions that many parents grapple with as their children take their first steps into the adult world.

The Importance of Developing Essential Skills

Moving from the structured environment of high school to the independence of university life requires a set of skills that are fundamental for thriving in adulthood. Whether you’re a young adult or someone who supports one, it’s crucial to consider how these skills can be developed and nurtured.

Self-Advocacy and Self-Determination

At the heart of adulthood is the ability to advocate for oneself. This involves recognizing one’s strengths, interests, and values, while also being able to voice needs and seek help when necessary. For my daughter, navigating a new educational system, making new friends, becoming familiar with the local culture and possibly dealing with challenges like homesickness will require her to express her needs clearly and assertively.

Encouraging young people to understand their own capabilities fosters a sense of self-determination. It’s important for them to realize that they have a voice and that their opinions matter. This sense of agency empowers them to make informed decisions about their education, career paths, and importantly also establish healthy relationships.

Life Skills

Practical life skills are indispensable. From managing money to effective communication, these competencies are critical for independence. As she embarks on her university journey, my daughter must learn to budget her expenses, manage her time effectively, and cultivate professional behavior—skills that will serve her well at university and throughout her life.

Teaching young adults these life skills can be challenging, especially when the focus while they are still at home is often on academic attainment. However, if we fail to provide opportunities for learning these essential skills, we risk disadvantaging them in the long run. Encouraging the development of life skills alongside academic success creates a more balanced approach to adulthood. 

Building Support Networks

One of the most valuable aspects of the transition to adulthood is the opportunity to expand social networks and community connections. While maintaining close ties with family is essential, forging new relationships is equally important. For my daughter, this transition might mean joining clubs, attending events, and intentionally introducing herself to meet new people in her classes and beyond.

In addition to social support, professional networks are crucial. Connecting with mentors and adult service providers can help young adults navigate various systems, whether it’s finding internships, understanding healthcare options, or accessing employment services. The earlier they start building these networks and learning to communicate with those who gatekeep access to services, the better prepared they will be for the future.

Managing New Responsibilities

With independence comes new responsibilities. For many young adults, this looks like balancing education with employment or involvement in clubs and organizations. Planning schedules that meet all their commitments and new chores such as cooking, cleaning and laundry, may present hurdles that are unexpected. For a young person, pursuing further education, entering the workforce, even part-time, and taking care of daily needs are significant milestones that require planning, goal-setting, and commitment.

Education and Employment

As my daughter begins her studies, I hope she approaches her education with a sense of purpose, even as that may evolve over the coming years. Gaining experience through her classes and part-time jobs or internships will be formative, helping her develop practical skills and offering glimpses into potential career paths. While some young people have clear objectives, others take their time so every experience can provide valuable insights on how they can apply their knowledge and talents.

Financial Management

Financial literacy is another critical component of adulthood, often overlooked in discussions about transition. While I am not a financial expert, I recognize that understanding money management is crucial for young adults. Teaching concepts such as budgeting, saving, and understanding credit empowers young people to take control of their finances, leading to more confident and independent living.

Emotional and Psychological Adjustment

The transition to adulthood encompasses not only practical skills but also emotional and psychological adjustments. Young adults frequently face challenges since post-secondary environments are often so competitive and living independently exposes them to so many new and often unexpected challenges. Therefore, they may face difficulty coping with change and forming their secure identities.

Coping with Change

Moving away from home, adapting to a new environment, and managing academic pressures can be emotionally overwhelming. Many young people are surprised by the intensity of this experience and may mistakenly believe they are alone in their struggles. However, it is essential to understand that these feelings are normal. Developing healthy coping strategies—such as mindfulness, time management, and seeking support from peers—can help young adults navigate these challenges. Resilience, the ability to bounce back from setbacks, is a vital trait that can be cultivated both before and during this transition, and includes a recognition that ‘failure’ is learning.

Identity Formation

This period is also a time for exploration and self-discovery. Young adults often grapple with questions of identity and values, seeking to understand who they are and what they stand for. Encouraging open discussions about these topics can help them navigate this complex journey, fostering a deeper understanding of themselves. 

Planning and Goal-Setting

Having clear goals and a vision for the future provides direction and motivation. Young adults benefit from setting short- and long-term goals, whether related to academics, careers, or personal aspirations. This practice not only fosters a sense of purpose but also encourages self-reflection and growth.

Flexibility

It is essential to remain flexible during this transition. The path to adulthood rarely follows a straight line; there are often detours and unexpected turns along the way. Being adaptable and open to different pathways enables young adults to respond positively to changes and challenges.

Seeking Support

For a young adult facing challenges in any of these areas, knowing how to seek support can make a world of difference. For parents, it can be challenging to offer encouragement while also respecting their child's independence. As my daughter embarks on her new adventure, I am reminded that the transition to adulthood is a process—one that looks different for everyone. By focusing on developing essential skills, building support networks, and fostering emotional resilience, young people like her can better prepare for the myriad challenges and opportunities that life presents.

For those of us who care about young adults—whether as parents, mentors, or friends—it is vital to provide guidance and support without imposing our own expectations. Let’s celebrate their achievements, encourage their growth, and remind them that they are not alone on this journey. If you have experiences to share or seek support in navigating this transition, I invite you to connect with me. Together, we can foster a community that empowers young adults to thrive as they step into their futures.

Book an appointment with me for additional support today - be it as a young adult looking for some additional guidance and support, or for a parent wanting to learn how to best support their child through this life stage transition.