By Ho Shee Wai

Director / Registered Psychologist

Having shared goals and dream is an important aspect of being a couple. Dr. John Gottman’s research shows most relationship conflict (especially gridlocked conflict) finds its roots in unfulfilled dreams. So how do you align your goals and dreams as a couple? One of the out of the box suggestions is a Relationship Vision Board.

 A vision board is a collage of images, words, and affirmations that represent your goals, dreams, and desires. The concept of vision boards has its roots in the broader practice of visualization, an idea suggesting that visualizing goals can help manifest them into reality.

In the realm of personal development, vision boards have become a powerful tool for goal setting and motivation. It help individuals clarify your objectives, visualize your future, and maintain focus on what truly matters to you. This practice encourages a proactive approach to life, allowing people to align your actions with your aspirations.

Benefits for Couples

We know the benefits of a vision board for individual. But is there any benefit to be doing a relationship vision board as a couple?

Enhances Communication

Creating a vision board together opens the door for meaningful conversations about each partner's desires and aspirations. This process encourages couples to share your thoughts and feelings about your future, which can deepen your understanding of one another. By discussing what you want to achieve individually and as a couple, partners can foster a more open and honest dialogue. This enhanced communication can lead to better conflict resolution, increased empathy, and a stronger emotional connection.

Provides a Visual Representation of Shared Goals

A vision board serves as a tangible reminder of a couple's shared dreams and objectives. By visually representing your goals — such as home ownership, travel plans, or starting a family — couples can keep your aspirations front and centre in your daily lives. This visualization not only reinforces your commitment to each other but also serves as a motivational tool. When couples see your own goals represented, it can inspire you to take actionable steps towards achieving them, turning abstract dreams into concrete plans.

Encourages Collaboration and Teamwork

The process of creating a vision board together inherently promotes teamwork. Couples must work together to identify your shared goals, select images, and design your board. This collaborative effort fosters a sense of partnership and unity, reinforcing the idea that you are in this journey together. As you collaborate on your vision board, couples can strengthen your bond, developing skills in compromise and negotiation. Moreover, by holding each other accountable for pursuing your goals, partners can cultivate a supportive environment that encourages growth both individually and as a couple.

Preparing to Create Your Vision Board

Setting the Mood:

• Choose a comfortable space.

• Gather materials (poster board, magazines, scissors, glue, etc.).

Timing:

• Find an appropriate time to work on this together (e.g., during a weekend retreat or date night).

Open Dialogue:

• It would be good if you as couple can discuss your individual goals before starting.

Identifying Shared Goals and Dreams

Reflection Questions:

• What do you envision for your future together?

• What personal dreams do you want to support in each other?

• How do you define success as a couple?

For this time to be more productive, write down your goals and dreams separately before sharing with each other.

Creating the Vision Board

Step-by-Step Process:

Step 1: Gather Images and Quotes:

Look for visuals that represent your goals in magazines or online.

Step 2: Arrange and Design:

Discuss how to layout the board. Consider themes (e.g., travel, family, career).

Step 3: Paste and Personalize:

Glue images and words onto the board, adding personal touches like drawings or notes.

Tips for Collaboration:

Couple should focus on working together and respecting each other's ideas.

Displaying and Utilizing Your Vision Board

Where to Place It:

Find a location (e.g., bedroom, home office) where the vision board can be seen daily.

Reviewing Progress:

Regularly check-ins to discuss the board and make adjustments as needed.

Celebrating Achievements:

It is important to celebrate each milestone as goals are met.

Overcoming Challenges

Creating a relationship vision board can be an enriching experience, but it also presents challenges that couples may need to navigate. Here are some common issues you might face, along with effective solutions.

Common Issues

Disagreements on Goals.

Couples may find yourselves at odds over your individual aspirations and how these fit into your shared vision. For example, one partner might prioritize career advancement, while the other may focus on starting a family or pursuing personal passions. These conflicting priorities can lead to tension and frustration, making it difficult to create a cohesive vision board.

Lack of Motivation to Pursue Shared Dreams.

Even after creating a vision board, couples might struggle to stay motivated to pursue your shared goals. Life’s daily stresses — such as work, financial pressures, or parenting — can overshadow the excitement and commitment to their vision. Over time, the board may become just another decoration rather than a source of inspiration and direction.

Solutions

Seeking Professional Guidance.

When disagreements on goals become a significant barrier, consulting a psychologist, counsellor, or relationship therapist can provide valuable support. A professional can facilitate open communication, helping each partner express your feelings and desires without judgment. They can also assist in finding common ground, guiding couples to develop shared goals that honor both partners' aspirations. This external perspective can be instrumental in navigating conflicts and fostering a collaborative spirit.

Regular Communication.

To maintain alignment and motivation, couples should prioritize regular communication about their goals and the vision board. Setting aside time to discuss progress, challenges, and feelings can help ensure both partners remain engaged in the process. This ongoing dialogue allows couples to address any emerging issues promptly, fostering a deeper understanding of each other’s needs and motivations.

Revisit and Revise the Vision Board.

As life evolves, so do individual and shared goals. Couples should schedule periodic check-ins to revisit their vision board and assess their progress. This practice can be refreshing and can help reignite motivation. During these sessions, partners can discuss what’s working, what’s not, and make necessary adjustments to your goals. It’s also an opportunity to celebrate accomplishments, no matter how small, which can enhance motivation and commitment.

Create Smaller, Achievable Milestones.

To combat a lack of motivation, couples can break their larger goals into smaller, more manageable milestones. This approach allows for incremental progress, making the overall vision feel less daunting. Celebrating these smaller achievements together can boost morale and reinforce the sense of teamwork.

Engage in Joint Activities Related to Goals.

Participating in activities that align with their shared goals can enhance motivation and strengthen your bond. For example, if travel is a shared aspiration, couples might start planning a weekend getaway together or researching destinations. These experiences can make the goals feel more tangible and create shared excitement about the journey ahead.

Conclusion

While challenges like disagreements on goals and lack of motivation can arise when creating a relationship vision board, they are not insurmountable. By seeking professional guidance, maintaining open communication, revisiting the board regularly, setting achievable milestones, and engaging in joint activities, couples can navigate these challenges effectively. Ultimately, the process of creating and maintaining a vision board can become a powerful tool for growth, unity, and shared purpose in a relationship.

Start your vision board today now as a couple and see where this brings you as a couple. If you are facing challenges, book in a session with our team of Psychologists, Counsellors, and Relationship Therapists.